Ignorance

Oh my ignorance...to be a truly dreadfully honest Christian girl, I am very ignorant. I would say it is completely natural to be ignorant but that would be an excuse...a straight out lie even. A quote that I like to use often is "Ignorance is Bliss" which is definitely true, especially in the midst of awkward situations. But when it comes to my relationship with God, ignorance is absolutely NOT bliss. But it is in fact stupidity and selfishness. I have been ignorant of God many times, even while working as an intern at my church. I feel shame to even think about it, but it is the truth. Devotions? What are those? If you watched my life (and you wouldn't even have to be God to see this) you would maybe see me pick up my Bible to prepare a lesson for  the kids at church and maybe to read something for the message on a Sunday morning and possibly once in a while because I feel like reading God's Word (a rare occasion unfortunately). Does all this mean that I am not a Christian and that I don't love God and want to do His will? No, I don't think so. In fact I often have a strong desire to read God's Word, but it is all a great dream in my head and it often doesn't go much further than that. Why is it that I can make the time to run every day but not make the time for God? Ignorance. I think maybe I have gotten into some harmful thinking patterns like, "It's ok to be ignorant, God still loves me!" or "I'm proving that God is awesome because He is faithful to me even when I am not!" (I prove that second one a lot). While both of those thoughts are completely true, neither of them are valid excuses for me not to be deliberately investing in my relationship with God. If I can make time for so many other people and things in my life, and God is supposed to be the most important, why can't I make God a priority? Well, I already know that I cannot do anything by my own strength. But I know that to be a truly devoted Christian I have to put in some effort. This is not the first time I have come to recognize my ignorance, I have known of it for quite a long time now. I just pray that by God's grace I can live and grow as He desires and that I would be able to set patterns of devotion that cannot be broken by my selfish ignorance. After all, everything I have is given to me by God, and that includes my time...

Running in Rain

Training for a half-marathon is hard work, but the weather makes it fun. This morning I began my run at 6:00am and the sky was a light shade of pink covering a dark grey cloud. I figured that it would rain eventually but I wasn't sure. Either way, I was going to run. I was about halfway through my run when the sky began to sprinkle. With 5km to go, I pushed through and by the end the rain had begun to pour and I was drenched when I got home. The best part of the run was not the finish, it was the middle, when I got to see lightning flash across the sky; talk about the power of God!

      "For I know that the LORD is great,
            and that our Lord is above all gods.
       Whatever the LORD pleases, he does,
            in heaven and on earth,
            in the seas and all deeps.
       He it is who makes the clouds rise at the end of the earth,
            who makes lightnings for the rain
            and brings forth the wind from his storehouses." - Psalm 135:5-7