Reflection

When I look in the mirror I know what I see.

Do other people see what I see when they look at me?
Does that even matter?

I want people to see Jesus when they look at me.

But when I look at me I see a broken human being who is increasingly thankful for the grace of God because she is a sinner.

I want to be more like Christ but obedience is difficult.

My flesh searches after and yearns for everything this world has to offer while my soul cries out to the Lord for rescue from this path of destruction.

What will it take for me to stay on the path toward righteousness?

I spent some time this morning singing a song. I've posted the lyrics here.

This song is close to my heart as it speaks well of my longing to stop walking away from God and stay in His presence and choose to obey.

Nothing is better than that.
I've been there before and it is the best place I can be but I  have to choose to be there. I have to fight against myself to get there and fight harder to remain.

I need to stop looking in the mirror and turn my eyes towards Jesus.
Nothing and no one else matters more.

Dealing with Stress

I have denied ever feeling stressful in the past but I can't deny it anymore. Stress is actually happening. At this point in my life I am waiting for my clinical schedule and hoping that I can work enough hours to make ends meet during the year and also have time to commit to church ministry and soccer.

That's not all.

Things may or may not have fallen apart at work this week as someone very significant was let go. This puts my scholarship at risk which means I may have to job hunt for the first time in my life.

Stop...

God will provide. He has always been faithful and he will continue to be. If I have to struggle for a while, I can trust it is for a good purpose.

Right now I need to humble myself and realize that my life is not ultimately about me. It is about Jesus Christ and his glorification. He is the reason that I live. The reason that I will live forever. He is my Saviour. I owe everything to him.

Breathe. God is in control.